


Our Boss is Kidcore??

by Tea_is_Not_Them



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Cottagecore Sasha James, Crack, Fluff, Friendship, Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist Wears a Skirt, Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist With a Cane, Kidcore Jonathan Sims, Me fucking around really, Punk Martin Blackwood, Romantic Era Goth Tim Stoker, Scene Aesthetic, Scene Elias, Season One Polycule
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-31
Updated: 2020-10-31
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:40:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27314203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tea_is_Not_Them/pseuds/Tea_is_Not_Them
Summary: The Season One Archives Crew and their conflicting aesthetics, and the shenanigans therein.
Relationships: Hinted JonMartin - Relationship, Hinted Season One Polycule, Jonathan Sims & Martin Blackwood, Martin Blackwood & Sasha James & Tim Stoker
Comments: 24
Kudos: 123





	Our Boss is Kidcore??

**Author's Note:**

> Me and my friends were dicking around in discord and made this hell au! Also Kidcore Jon kinda owns my heart <3
> 
> My Socials!
> 
> Insta: tea_is_not_them  
> Tiktok: teaisnotthem  
> Tumblr: tea-is-not-them

Looking at the Archival crew at first glance, you'd probably expect their aesthetics to all be dark academia, academia, or maybe just office chic, or god forbid none at all, since the dress code was a little strict. You would be wrong. It had caught them all off guard when they started going over to each others flats to watch movies and such as coworkers- Tim said that it was them hiding behind teamwork to be besties, and no one disagreed- that they realized that their friends were not actually limited to their work clothes.

Sasha had a large variety of sundresses and frilled undershirts, large brimmed hats and sandals, speaking volumes about her cottagecore obsession. Five pairs of overalls in different washes, skirt overalls, blouses, a mushroom hat, and gardening boots, not even hidden in her décor either. They hadn’t expected this of her, but she rocked the look.

Tim’s had been known by Sasha, but not Martin, until they all went out to dinner at a bar, and he saw the romantic era goth that resided in Tim. The ruffled black dress shirts and leather blazers and ripped dress pants, and the black crown that he had custom made- yes he was that extra. He looked very regal actually, but it was a shock to Martin’s poor system. His makeup collection vastly outweighed Sasha’s.

Martin’s had sent both Sasha and Tim into cardiac arrest on the spot. He had a lovely arrayed amount of ripped jeans and platforms, band tees that were distressed by years of wear. His nail polish collection was dark and one of awe to the others. Punk had been his solace after his mother started getting worse as a teenager. He rather liked his chokers and makeup that could almost outdo Tim’s collection.

Once the cat was out of the bag for each of them, they rathered to wear what they liked as a group, sometimes you get weird looks from strangers, but it was easier to deal with that when you all looked a bit like weirdos together. 

They had gone shopping together a few times, critiquing outfits and styles, before falling into the same routine. It wasn’t like the clothes were their life any who. They just were quite a spectacle when they went out together. 

Martin took a sip of his tea, sitting with Sasha and Tim as they argued about something or other. He thinks it's about Sasha’s basil plant, and Tim is trying to help even though he had never taken care of a plant in his life. He turned back in just in time to hear Sasha gasp, and almost spill her drink.

“Sasha are you?-” Sasha slapped a hand over Tim’s mouth, and Martin’s teeth clinked shut. He didn’t want her getting his lipstick all over her hand. 

“Shut the fuck up-! Look!” She whisper-yelled, pointing wildly at an approaching figure. 

Said approaching figure was a man they all knew very well: Jonathan Sims.

“Oh my god is he wearing-” Tim mutters through Sasha’s hand, slightly muffled.

Jonathan Sims, their very professional cardigan and button up wearing boss, was wearing a neon pink skirt with knee length socks that didn’t match colors, one being neon yellow and the other being neon green, with a cute pair of Mary Janes. His shirt was black and pink stripes, with a bright yellow raincoat over that. His makeup was a completely different thing, bright glossy lips blowing bubblegum. Oh my god was that glitter in his facial hair?

Martin thinks that his brain went like a 404 error on a computer, he was imagining this. No way his boss was wearing -- is that kandi?!

Sasha and Tim were in similar states of complete shock, watching as Jon played on his phone. Even his cane was bedazzled, what the fuck. That was the only thing that went through anyone's head as their usually bleak looking boss looked like he just jumped out of a candy box for kids. 

Their pure paralyses at the sight was ended when Jon looked up from his phone, about to walk into the same café that the three of them occupied, and made eye contact with the three of them. His face went from almost content to immediate fight or flight look, eyes widened. That was the look he got whenever Elias came into the office, but to be fair their boss was freaking weird.

“Jon?” Martin called a bit, and Jon stared for a second more before turning and almost running away. No scratch that, he was absolutely darting as fast as he could, dear god his knee was going to be killing him later.

“We all saw that right? Like I’m not off my shit on caffeine and imagining that right?” Tim asks, when Sasha finally took her hand back and wiped off the smudged lip gloss that transferred from Tim’s lips onto a napkin. 

Martin looked down at his tea, “I can’t believe he’s kidcore.”

“Kidcore!” Sasha crows back, still as confused as the two of them. She adjusted her wide brim hat and stared at her scone, “I wouldn’t have guessed kidcore!”

“Oh I so need to see that wardrobe of his.” Tim said, conspiratorially, and they both kind of agreed.

\--------

Jon was sitting in his office, praying to god that they forgot they had ever seen him that weekend, and trying to get through a stack of files. Maybe they weren’t actually there and those were three people who looked almost exactly like his assistants. 

God was not a merciful person, it seemed, because his coworkers had taken the opportunity to stare at him like he was a museum exhibit when he passed. He pretended not to notice their looks because he was going to try and keep his professionality, he was their boss!

There was a knock at the door, and Tim poked his head in, grinning at Jon, “Soooo boss. I have a question.”

“Lord that’s never good, work related I hope?” It was not going to be work related Jon knew this, he knew it more than he knew that the sky was blue, and that Gertrude Robinson was incompetent. 

Tim slid into the room, looking very different from his weekend look. Jon had a hard time recognizing them that day, but as soon as he saw Martin’s bright reddish blond hair, he kind of immediately knew exactly who he was looking at. Tim was getting shushed by Sasha, and he had absolutely darted the hell out of there. 

He was not a lucky person, and Tim was standing next to the desk, “So bossman, kidcore?”

“I will fire you.” He said gruffly, flipping through something in the drawer, trying not to make eye contact.

Tim laughed, crossing his arms as if confident, “You won’t, you like me too much.”

“Bold assumption that I don’t just like your correctly formatted files.” Jon replies, keeping deadpan at Tim’s false hurt expression, even if it were slightly funny. They were almost friends in research, not enough for Jon to show off his extensive kandi collection but certainly friendly terms. 

“Horrible! But… you should wear it to drinks with your lovely assistants this weekend.” Tim says, putting on the same voice he uses with people he’s trying to get information from.

Jon rolled his eyes, “Tim it’s unprofessional of me, as your boss-”

“Blah blah professionalism, blah blah, yes I’d love to go for drinks with my amazing assistants Tim, thank you for inviting me.” Tim grinned again, in the way he does when he thinks he's being funny, “That’s what I heard!”

“It is a wonder how someone hasn’t complained about you yet.” Jon says, though it was a little funny, even so he didn’t want to encroach on their assistant time, and it was a bit weird to have them know him as anything other than their boss, with his stuffy cardigans. The idea that they saw him in his bright pink skirt was a bit mortifying actually. 

Those were his comfort clothes really, and he had kept them away from an office environment, mostly due to fear of ridicule. 

Tim leaned on his elbows over the desk, “So that’s a yes?”

“No.”

“Gah! Boring, come on Jon just once.”

Jon rolled his eyes again, “No Tim, don’t you have follow ups to work on or something?”

Tim sighed as dramatically as he could, but did leave the room. He could hear him complaining to Sasha about it, and almost rolled his eyes for the third time, before just continuing to do his work. The tapping of the pen slowly made him feel less watched, and went to record a few statements. 

Sasha had come in a few hours later, looking every bit like she was there just for files. The box in her hand looked lighter than he assumed it'd be, but he was glad to get some actual work done. Maybe he could leave the weekend behind, something he had almost forgotten about until Sasha walked in. 

“Hello Sasha.” He said, and Sasha smiled at him.

“Hi Jon.” She says, setting down a box, “So. Martin, Tim and I are going to hold a dress code rebellion, and we think you can help.”

“Oh this again.” Jon groaned, taking the follow-up she had brought him with exasperation. 

Sasha grinned, “Yup! Mine and Tim’s idea. Come on, it’ll be fun. A team building exercise!”

“It does not count as team building if we go against the rules.”

“I heard a we!” Sasha said, and Jon slapped a hand to his face, pinching the bridge of his nose.

\----------

It had taken them three weeks of friendly encouragement --- see bullying their boss/friend into wearing his cute bright outfit -- to get Jon to join in on their rebellion against Elias’s office clothes tyranny, at least that's what Tim called it. 

The day came, and the three archival assistants met up to check out the outfits. Jon should be meeting them as well, the first time they had gotten him to even agree to an outside work thing! They were whittling him down, and Tim was proud of his wonderful bullying skills. 

Sasha was wearing a full length handmade patch skirt and large beige sweater with a shawl over it, her wide brimmed and old fashioned hat was almost too much, but her slightly pink lips was it for makeup. Instead of a purse she had taken to holding a wicker basket with her things in it. She got a pumpkin latte just to get the vibes ramped up to the max. 

Tim had gone full out with the eyeshadow, a lovely leather blazer over the ruffled black shirt and embroidered vest. He went full out with a hat as well, his makeup dripping as if he had been in the rain. His shoes make loud clicking noises as he walks, making him look very elegant, but also terrifying. His Frappuccino kind of cast the look he wanted off, but getting a black coffee sounded like hell. 

Martin was already a tall man, but with the platforms he was taller than Sasha and Tim, who were usually the tallest, his jeans ripped at the knees, with fishnets. A band shirt with the sleeves ripped off and a leather jacket with patches over that. His eyeliner was sharp enough to kill a man. He got a tea, courtesy of Sasha who refused to let him pay. 

They were all getting their food, the cashiers from this café already knew their fashion choices, and they heard the bell ding, and a familiar clicking of a cane.

Jon went full out as well, a rainbow striped shirt with bright red overalls that were cut off at the knees. He had wrists full of kandi, along with barrettes all in his salt and pepper hair. His glasses chains were replaced with kandi ones. 

“Jon you actually showed!” Sasha said, grinning widely. He blinked up at them and cleared his throat, not seeming as uncomfortable they thought he might. It was hard to feel out of place when they all looked like they had been thrown up by a Pinterest board. 

“Ah yes I did. I’d rather not be the odd one out.” This was true, imagine he walked into the office and the three of them had decided against it. No way in hell was he going to deal with that kind of berating from Elias, and he certainly will not deal with it alone. He would have had a heart attack, absolutely perish on the spot. 

Martin smiled softly, and tried to strike up some conversation. It was nice to see his boss/crush look so comfortable, “Did you make the kandi yourself?”

Slightly taken aback Jon nodded, and the two then started talking about kandi, and how to make a certain kind of cuff. This ended up with Jon being horrified at Martin’s old attempts and telling him he would make him a cuff. Tim and Sasha were grinning at each other, and they all walked to the institute looking a bit like a tumblr dashboard. 

Rosie looked up at them and smiled, “Nice outfits.” And that was that from her. Everyone else looked at them a second longer than needed, but kept to themselves.

The four of them went down into the Archives, the basement looking horrible, still a right whirlwind of files that Gertrude had left it. Jon came out of his office a little more that day, until an hour before lunch, the door opened to the stairs. 

“Oh my fucking god.” Martin said under his breath, getting him a shocked look from Jon, until Jon noticed the person walking down. He almost hid behind the absolute tree that was Martin in platforms -- he wouldn't admit it but he very much hid behind Martin.

Elias was decked out in full 2014 scene. Hair swept to the side and kept that way with too much hairspray, feathers and beads hanging from his head, arms full of kandi, and a lot of neon green. Were those fucking cat ears?! The bright neon green fishnets that covered his arms under the band tee shirt sent the four archival staff into a shared second of pure panic.

Then he started telling them about the dress code. Mother fucker!

This is war, the four archival staff said. They will not get chewed out if Elias even has that in his closet. Their Boss was going down, and they would be wearing their most obnoxiously aesthetic outfits and outdressing that old bastard.

**Author's Note:**

> This was so self indulgent, I wish I had art skills to actually draw the gang LMAO


End file.
